actually my first time of visiting their
home after I had Chinaza where she is
now. I threw my greetings around like
I was doing broadcast planting.
"Where is Naza?" I asked, surprised that
everyone was so calm.
They all pointed up to her room.
"In her room?" I asked and they all
shouted me upstairs. I was disturbing
their movie.
I busted into her room and met her
wiping blood from her hand. I rushed
her and held her hand.
"What happened?"
She slowly opened her hand to reveal a
small knife cut in her palm.
"I cut my hand while peeling oranges."
She was giving me a look that was
expecting sympathy. I wished I knew
how to hiss.
"This is why you called me out this
night. Small injury like this?"
"No, come and finish peeling these
oranges, I swear I will leak them."
She was begging and she was beautiful.
I kept wondering why a girl like her
would stick around with a guy like me.
Love took over and I was peeling
oranges in no time. Then Davido's "If"
came up and I joined in. We were
actually doing a duet.
"If I tell you say I love you o!!" I sang
and she responded.
"My money, my bother na your own o
baby!!" she sang in her sweet voice. I
eyed her and nearly cut myself open.
"Naza respect yourself, which your
body na my own?"
"What do you mean, is it not yours
again?" she asked.
"The body that you have refused to
allow me touch since this baby came
up."
Then my favorite part came up.
"No do no do, no do gra gra for me o."
Fast forward to the "I go shook you
shooku shooku part", I sang it with all
my heart and she switched off the
music.
"See neche," she said and held my arm.
"every time is not for shooku shooku.
At least relax and appreciate what you
have. If you keep wanting to shook me,
then I will have to start suspecting that
you don't actually love me, that you
are only after my body."
I dropped the orange and held her.
"That is not true naa, I love other part
of you as well and you know it."
"Then stop wanting to shook all the
time. At least, you should be grateful
that my family didn't throw me out
because of this pregnancy and we
should take things easy small. See me
here, I am not going anywhere, I love
you and will always be around even
though you keep messing up. I won't
go. I have taken enough poo from you
to walk away."
I was touched and for the first time in
my life, I felt real guilty for cheating
on her. I brought her closer and placed
my lips on her forehead while I rubbed
her belly, feeling the little bulge in
there.
"Do you think it's a girl?"
She smiled and looked at me.
"I want it to be a boy, I want to know
what you looked like when you were
born."
I kissed her mouth and she held my lips
with her teeth. I was able to Ignore her
ass and boobs all those while. A
miracle.
"Thank you for sticking with an
arsehole like me, even though I have
nothing to offer except my dick."
She laughed and punched me playfully.
"You are not going home this night, You
will stay here," she was commanding,
my opinion didn't matter.
"And your people?" I asked.
"They are tired of fighting with me,
they won't bother us."
I made my call to Willie and told him I
was sleeping over at Naza's. He was
only too glad. He was going to eat my
own share of the spaghetti my sister
cooked.
I carried my baby and my baby in her
to bed and dropped her gently. I locked
the door and joined her. She placed her
head on my chest.
For the first time, I appreciated what it
felt like to sleep beside a girl I really
loved and nothing happened. No
shooking or any other thing.
I promise a lot of you would really
enjoy this if you gave it a try but
eventually not me. I love shooku
shooku pass Davido.
I handed my list over to my father. He
was of the opinion that it was the
excess money that he was giving me
that made me keep my girlfriend in my
lodge and be getting her pregnant
anyhow. So he decided I was going to
break every expenses down on paper,
that way I won't have change to feed
any girl. "Excess money", Imagine.
"What do you need 6 packs of toilet
rolls for? Do you run a public toilet?"
he asked me, observing me over the
rims of his eyeglasses.
"And see this one, 2 towels? What for?"
"Dad, it's for the remaining 3 years I
have in school."
"So you want to use 2 towels over a
period of 3 years, so that you will come
and be spreading disease everywhere?"
Hian, daddy sef.
"One carton of Indomie," he read out.
"Where do you even get the strength to
be impregnating girls when all you eat
is indomie?"
Willie who was busy with his laptop
and had headphones over his head
giggled, That MOTHERFUCKER!
"Papa Willie!" my mom yelled and eyed
him. He hissed and continued.
"And look at this one, he can't even
spell knickers," he said and shot me his
eyes again.
"Which one?" I asked, going closer to
take a peep at the list.
"Ar ar, Daddy is sneakers nah not
knickers."
"What is sneakers?"
"A types of shoe."
He shook his head and continued, if
only he would just give me the money
and Bleep the list. It reminded me of
my elder sister's days in the dormitory.
She would bring him her list and he
will be like.
"Why 5 sanirary pads? Are you
marketing them in school?" and when
she decides to save herself the
interview and remove sanitary pads
from the list, he would be like.
"Why no pads? Come Oluchukwu Rita,
are you pregnant?"
And my mom will always be there to
intervene but my popsy no send
anybody.
"And you should include condoms in
this list because I am now afraid of
you, Chinecherem, your fear is catching
me."
And after everything, he broke the
whole expenses into 2. My father never
liked maths and he hardly stressed us
each time we flunked in any maths
exam. My mom will be scolding and he
would just be like.
"Leave this Children, how many times
have you applied X and Y in that your
small office? If he knows how many
500 nairas can give him 1 million, he
is ok, that is the basic thing." My
mother will only shake her head.
So when it came to money, Chike Obi
has nothing on my Popsy.
He divided my 21,525 naira into 2 and
divided one part into 2 again. He added
a half of the whole money to one part
of the the other divided half and gave
me 16,145. He probably knew I wasn't
going to buy one quarter of those things
on that list. So I was still rich anyway.
"Ehe willie, when are you going back
or have they expelled you?" he asked
my brother.
"Daddy nooo, I'm going back next
week."
"It's your last semester in that school,
so you won't buy anything naa."
"No sir, I'm not buying anything, it's
just that I need small money to fix some
things."
"I know, you are always needing
money, how much?"
"Just 50k," he said with a wide grin.
"Are you mad? Did you put JUST before
that 50k?"
My father actually removed his lenses
to ask him if he was mad. It was my
turn to giggle at him.
"Daddy no, I mean It's only 50k that I
need. Nothing else."
"What are you even doing with that
type of money? Are you sorting your
VC?"
"Daddy noo, We are, I mean my
department people, we are hosting a
graduation part and I need a pair of
tuxedos to shine dad. You know it's
once in a life time." he was grinning
ear to ear again.
"Party kwa? Are you graduating from
Quilox that you will each contribute
50k for it?"
"What is Quilox?" My mother asked.
"A Church in Onitsha," My father
replied so casually, I would have
believed him if I didn't know what
Quilox is. My mother only nodded and
continued pressing her phone.
"Daddy, the money is for tuxedo, party
and other things."
"I don't even understand the language
you are speaking, maybe when the sun
reduces, I will understand," my father
said and ran into his room before
Willie will remember any other dues.
I cat walked into Naza's room and met
her kneeling on her bed, saying the
divine mercy prayer. A miracle. I was
going to slowly sneak out of the room
before she caught me. She didn't talk.
She just pointed at the floor beside her.
I can't argue, I just jejely joined her.
Luckily enough, she was rounding up.
Her mother peeped into the room and
saw us. I was able to notice the smile
on her face. Yepaa, I have scored a
positive point on her score card.
"So by what time are we leaving?" she
asked after the prayer.
"Ermm, 3pm."
"I hope your lodge mates would be
back by then, that your logde that looks
like graveyard."
"See, I want to buy some things," I said,
standing up.
"Come first before you go."
She held my hand and I was expecting
her to order for fried rice or any other
impossible food. She eyed me with a
wicked smile on her face
"Don't worry, I just want you to rub
your baby's head."
I smiled and stroke her belly. The bulge
was still small. I kissed her forehead
and turned to go.
"Peel those oranges for me before you
go."
My father dropped us at the park and
made sure we both took different buses
back to school. One going to Anambra
State University and the other going to
unizik. He needed no further stories.
He even bought our tickets with his
money. My brother was just spicing my
anger with laughter. I swear he would
have followed my bus to my school if
he didn't have an appointment.
As I dragged my bag into my my lodge,
James wasn't back yet but shape and
her sister was. Even Chinaza was
already chatting away with Shape in
my room. That girl is a magician.
.
To be continued
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